Missed connection

[acc]

I’d like to thank you, light blue mini-van racing to make the light.

Thank you for passing me on the left because I had the audacity to take the lane, and then cut across in front of me as we went down that hill together. That move startled me and gave me a split second to reach my brakes.

Thank you for braking so hard your tires squealed as your reached the right turn lane.

But most of all, thank you for not actually coming to a stop because I would have slammed into the left corner of your bumper. They look very shiny from that close range.

I hope you have a pleasant day, thank you for not injuring me.

[americancyclo]

Dear Guy with a cold-

Thanks for inspiring me to really up the pace on my morning commute yesterday. I understand snot rockets, and I maintain a respectful 4 bike length distance, since we’re going about the same speed. But you weren’t blowing snot rockets, you were ejecting mucous mist from your nose, multiple times. maybe it was the way the sunlight caught the millions of nasty particles hanging in the air, waiting for me to ride through, but I just couldn’t stand the thought any longer. So thanks for making me get up out of the saddle and pass you so I wouldn’t have to breathe in whatever nasty infection you have.

[jrenaut]

Dear ZipCar turning into the parking garage (huh?) on 15th just south of M –

If you want to get that close to my ass again, you’re at least going to have to buy me dinner.

[bikesnick]

to the cabi rider crossing 123 at lewinsville/great falls street (3/15 about 130pm),

way to go! that is a far distance from a bikeshare station.

[baiskeli]

Dear cyclist number one,

Dude.

Yeah, nobody really stops at that stop sign on the Custis at the hotel entrance, but at least slowing down is advised. There was a car waiting to come in from the street, so there was no question that you needed to stop and yield. It’s not like he could have run your ass over since he had just seen me stop and yield and might presume it was safe to proceed.

Dear cyclist number two:

See above.

[aflapr]

I’m glad to see the folks doing work on the trails, but I had two up close and personal encounters with their trucks:

– Friday: truck was coming down the Brandymore Castle hill heading to the bridge work. I got off the trail to allow it to pass when the truck cut the corner missing me by inches.

– Monday: the truck was parked half-on/half-off the trail on the I-66 side just past the bridge under George Mason at the S-curve. I was able to see it when I came under the bridge, but anyone coming the other direction would have had no warning since the workers didn’t put out signs.

Today I broke my two-day streak. Maybe the cooler weather kept them off the trail.

[Subby]

Yesterday afternoon.

You: waiting for the light at the Lee Highway crossing on the W&OD, wearing kickass skull and crossbones bike shoes.

Me: Wishing I was cool.

[baiskeli]

@Subby 17216 wrote:

Yesterday afternoon.

You: waiting for the light at the Lee Highway crossing on the W&OD, wearing kickass skull and crossbones bike shoes.

Me: Wishing I was cool.

You look pretty cool in your avatar, kinda.

[acc]

This morning at Spring Hill Recreation Center:

You: Adonis on a bike. Beautiful legs, beautiful face, ratty messenger bag slung casually across your fine chest. There you were hammering down Lewinsville Road flying by at least 24 mph. I could not take my eyes off the rearview mirror. I can even forgive your ridiculous shorts/culottes combination because I get it–you’re way too cool for bike shorts.

Me: Stopped at the stoplight at Lewinsville Road and Spring Hill Road licking my lips as you approached.

You Idiot: You cut along my left, flew past eight cars waiting at the stoplight, hesitated 1/10 of a second before blowing through the red light, swung across multiple lanes of traffic from a position no car would ever expect you to be coming from and then adjusted your messenger bag and continued up Spring Hill Road. I lost interest immediately.

[Terpfan]

Lunchtime at Vermont & K:

To the helmetless man riding the red hybrid (I missed the brand): I sure hope you have really good health insurance and no assets because your choice to blow through a long red light and dodge moving traffic on K street like you were Pac-man left those of us bystanders on the sidewalk convinced you would be hit and severly, if not fatally, hurt. Next time, I would advise wearing a helmet, waiting for the green light, and otherwise not jutting between cars like Pac-man. On the bright side, it did almost seem like a movie set.

[baiskeli]

You’d make a great romance novelist, acc. But you’d need to spice up your endings a little.

@acc 17578 wrote:

This morning at Spring Hill Recreation Center:

You: Adonis on a bike. Beautiful legs, beautiful face, ratty messenger bag slung casually across your fine chest. There you were hammering down Lewinsville Road flying by at least 24 mph. I could not take my eyes off the rearview mirror. I can even forgive your ridiculous shorts/culottes combination because I get it–you’re way too cool for bike shorts.

Me: Stopped at the stoplight at Lewinsville Road and Spring Hill Road licking my lips as you approached.

You Idiot: You cut along my left, flew past eight cars waiting at the stoplight, hesitated 1/10 of a second before blowing through the red light, swung across multiple lanes of traffic from a position no car would ever expect you to be coming from and then adjusted your messenger bag and continued up Spring Hill Road. I lost interest immediately.

[vvill]

You: This morning in a dark green house cleaning services car, happily sharing the road with me going down Lee Highway, suddenly turning in front of me in the bike lane to take a right turn onto a side street (N Kenmore perhaps) with no signal.

Me: Initially thinking there was no way to avoid slamming into you, locking up the brakes, bike bouncing a bit, thankful I was riding in the drops and even more thankful I didn’t crash, feeling on edge the rest of the ride in. Wishing I had worn my Contour although it wouldn’t have made a difference since there was no impact. Garmin says speed went from 29 to 10mph and HR from 139 to 155.

You: This morning on Custis trail, evidently disturbed by the previous incident and sick of being bounced around on skinny tires, deciding to fly off my seat bag at the same intersection where I crashed and broke my arm last year. Your nice new shiny red plastic lens came flying off and got scratched, and you ejected one of the nice rechargeable AAA cells I put in you. The useless plastic clip that was once an integral part of you may never be found. At least you had the courage to turn yourself on while in my jacket pocket so I knew you weren’t a total loss by the time I got to work.

Me: Wondering where the heck my nice Blackburn rear blinkie went?! That thing never came off. Either misplaced or genuinely lost. Rueing this morning’s commute as I walked back up the trail to retrieve you from the middle of the road, almost wishing that the van that just passed by actually ran you over. Other cyclists just previously passed on the trail fly by as I remount, confirming my thoughts that blinkies bought for $2 in a night market in Taiwan are just not worth it – upgrade to Nashbar next time.

[KLizotte]

Sounds like the blinkie is on life support. May it rest in peace….

Glad you have all your fingers and toes today.

[jrenaut]

You: Eastbound on T St at New Hampshire NW, blue Prius, DC tags and Zone 2 RPP pass.

Me: The cyclist pulling my younger daughter in the trailer that you almost hit when you rolled the stop sign, annoyed at the pedestrian who was legally in your way, then continued through the intersection while I was legally moving southbound on New Hampshire.

Bonus points when you told the pedestrian who yelled at you “mind your own business”.

And thanks to Jack Evans, councilmember for the Ward where it happened, for responding quickly when I complained on Twitter. Hope to see increased police presence at that intersection, as well as 17th and New Hampshire. Cyclists, pedestrians, and cars all behave very badly there, and I want to see more tickets.

Again on the bright side, I got unclipped and put a foot down an inch from his bumper without falling. And I don’t think I swore, either, though I could be misremembering.

[baiskeli]

Dear young pretty girl turning right on red onto the Key Bridge through the Zone of Death,

Let’s meet for coffee and talk about our shared interests!

Let’s NOT, however meet by you not even looking to the right as you turn (ignoring the green crossing signal) and then running me over. M’kay?

[Author]

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