[pfunkallstar]

Geez – it is always the Town Cars. I was walking by the White House yesterday, during your traditional rolling of eggs, and a Town Car drove through the crosswalk…almost taking out a double stroller. Of course the eight police that witnessed this did absolutely nothing.

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I average maybe 3-4 a year, but they always seem to be:

– When it is raining. I was standing on Memorial Bridge during a thunderstorm once, desperately trying to change a flat.
– By the Lincoln Memorial. Apparently tour groups love to throw sharp glass everywhere.
– Towards the end of the week.

A lot of my flats could have been avoided by paying better attention to tire wear, not riding over fields of broken glass, or by properly inflating my tires before every ride.

[pfunkallstar]

Adamo is the way to go. Not too goofy looking, and connects with your bones rather than that pink stuff surrounding your bones.

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I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, the wind covers up my singing of the HMS Pinafore, this is unacceptable.

[pfunkallstar]

@bobco85 46704 wrote:

I agree. Around here, before heading out on your bike during winter the 3 things you focus on are 1) temperature, 2) wind chill, and 3) precipitation, whereas during summer the 3 things are 1) temperature, 2) humidity, and 3) air quality index (sometimes a 4th for crazy awesome summer thunderstorms).

Not to introduce too much chaos – but 5) tourists.

[pfunkallstar]

Me: Dude soaked to the bone because he was too dense to check the weather report yesterday biking home on the W&OD before East Falls Church.

You: The guy wearing white, short-short shorts trotting along in barefoot shoes with a cotton long sleeve on in the middle of the rain.

Firstly, that tingling sensation below your knees could be early-onset arthritis, or your feet falling off, consult a doctor. Secondly, holy hell, white shorts in the rain become no shorts in the rain, some things you can’t unsee. Thirdly, I’m sorry about the splashing but I didn’t think I was throwing up that much of a rooster tail, my bad.

[pfunkallstar]

Memorial was RIDICULOUS coming home today. DC side was okay, but the VA side was like Typhoon Tony Danza. I got around the bend and the wind meant that I didn’t have to pedal through the crosswalk…then I turned northbound – chug.

[pfunkallstar]

It all boils down to determination. It takes an equal amount of determination to ride 10 miles on a clunker versus 20 miles on an ELITE special. Both are a great workout, both require the same amount of grit, and both may appeal to some people more than others. I personally ride a SUPER ELITE all black carbon ride, which provides a little more incentive not to get smoked by a Huffy. Meanwhile, you better believe there are some Huffy dudes out there looking to do the same to me. This is Washington.

[pfunkallstar]

I see it as an excellent opportunity to conduct control studies on ELITE drafting v. bike garment body smell. Fascinating stuff.

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From Falls Church to Downtown – I’m doing pretty poorly, is their a happiness map though? Because I’m pretty sure I would be rocking that.

[pfunkallstar]

All signs point to no ice between East-West Falls Church, way too warm. Thank god, I almost ate it twice on that patch right before Great Falls.

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Why can’t we have dynamic Ninja warning devices installed on the W&OD? That or some sort of leader board. Just throwing out ideas here since we are just taking wads of cash and stuffing them into pie holes.

[pfunkallstar]

Ball-rockingly bad bike day. On the other hand no wipeouts on the W und OD! Slushtastic downtown.

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You’s Guys: A couple riding side-by-side on the W&OD…and yet another couple riding abreast on the Custis.
Me: The dude behind you admiring your love of cycling, nature, and double-arms-length-at-all-times seperation on the trail.

I smell spring in the air, this may be because I brought in a fresh towel. However, I was happy to see a lot of fresh, sunshine faces on the trail today, some of them chatting it up, side-by-side, like two swans entranced by a particularly verdant piece of pond flotsam. Today was a day to ride, and why not enjoy that time with a special friend?

But a word of caution to all trail couplings. Me, Baron von Vantopass, may be lurking behind you. I am sneaky, fast, and silent because of a recent chain cleaning. Surely you can hear my voice echoing against the retaining walls alerting you to my inssidious presence? No? Eye contact with you seemed to have little effect on your desire to maintain your position next to your beloved despite my wild gesticulations indicating my desire to swerve around you. No! NONE SHALL PASS.

[pfunkallstar]

Ah you have met the Drunken Master – all hail the Drunken Master. Not sure if we are talking about the same dude, but I tried passing a guy in the same area last week and he almost mega swerved right into me, offered nothing in the way of an apology, then casually readjusted he iPHONES – ELITE IS THIS DUDE.

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