The Shoal Report

[dasgeh]

I smile at them as they’re coming by. 75% of the time, they stop beside me. A couple have struck up conversations (usually about my bike, a few times about shoaling – they claimed to not know it was frowned upon).

If it’s at an intersection where it matters (e.g. you have to gun it from the green to hit the next light), I sometimes say something like “I hope you’re ready to gun it to make that light” when our light is about to turn. 87% of the people that do shoal me either do gun it or let me go through.

If I’m not in a rush/position at the intersection doesn’t matter or whatever, I just sit back and laugh at them.

Oh, and if they are going to block a crosswalk or otherwise endanger someone (like the a*hat that started to shoal me, then the light turned green, then tried to force me out into moving car traffic), I say something.

[krazygl00]

@83(b) 93567 wrote:

Just….grrrrr….

http://www.citylab.com/navigator/2014/08/cyclists-lets-talk-about-shoaling/379232/

Kriston Capps, Cyclists: Let’s Talk About Shoaling wrote:

So, shoaling: You’re stopped at a red light with a bunch of folks on bikes, when someone who’s just arrived sails past everyone, right to the head of the class. It’s a lot like seeing somebody in the Whole Foods express lane with too many things.

No. And that is obviously the wrong analogy.

I’m taken with Weiss’s vivid term: a shoal, as in a grouping of fish. But it’s plain that he and many more would prefer that bikers moved like a school of fish, in perfect rhythm.

Again, no. That’s not the right definition of “shoal” in this case. I think Capps is writing about a subject he hasn’t bothered to really understand. I need to find out where he shops for groceries so I can butt in line in front of him.

[dplasters]

I’m genuinely blown away that he doesn’t understand that shoaling has nothing to do with fish and everything to do with sandbars. From the BSNYC article he even freaking links to:

On a busy day, this accumulation results in sort of a shoal of cyclists which juts out into the middle of the street like a sandbar of idiocy.

At that point you just have to write off his article as a stream of clickbait vomit. He doesn’t know anything.

[dkel]

I don’t get aggravated by shoalers that don’t seem to know any better, but I do get aggravated by shoalers that do so because they assume that they are faster than I am. I’m not even a competitive person. Not at all. Really.

[ShawnoftheDread]

@baiskeli 93606 wrote:

I think people shoal for the same reason pedestrians wait standing two feet into the roadway for a walk sign, or they begin to enter an elevator without waiting for others to exit, or they go through the double door that someone else is using rather than simply opening the other one, even if it is on the other side.

Yes, but all of those people need to be pummeled about the head and neck. Really folks, they’re never going to stop if we don’t give them some harsh negative reinforcement. I vote we use those blow-up pommel sticks they give out at ball games.

[culimerc]

I usually give them a soft “Really?!?!” as they go by, just loud enough for them to hear.

[rcannon100]

Shoaling was EXCELLENT at the intersection of doom this morning! I love using the Shoalers as human shields as I go across Doom.

[Rockford10]

@rcannon100 93663 wrote:

Shoaling was EXCELLENT at the intersection of doom this morning! I love using the Shoalers as human shields as I go across Doom.

I was waiting to cross Rt. 7 in Tysons (by foot) one day and got shoaled by another ped. The “wow” sound I sometimes make in these situations was being formed by my lips until I realized, sure, go first. You’ll get hit and I won’t. Score.

[bobco85]

@rcannon100 93663 wrote:

Shoaling was EXCELLENT at the intersection of doom this morning! I love using the Shoalers as human shields as I go across Doom.

I just had this thought of the Intersection of Doom being a chessboard with pedestrians as pawns, cyclists as knights, and vehicles as every other piece on the board since they can hit you from any angle. Yes, you can jump ahead of the pawns as a knight, but let the pawns go first (evil laugh)!

[cyclingfool]

@bobco85 93710 wrote:

I just had this thought of the Intersection of Doom being a chessboard with pedestrians as pawns, cyclists as knights, and vehicles as every other piece on the board since they can hit you from any angle. Yes, you can jump ahead of the pawns as a knight, but let the pawns go first (evil laugh)!

I’d love to see cars pull a castling maneuver.

[83b]

I have once again found the outer limits of my patience. Happily it seems to be greater than last year; unhappily DC’s bike community doesn’t seem to be getting any less dickish as it grows in size.

I lost count at 40 today for times shoaled/passed with no warning, which I think is a new record. Including this entire batch of 8 by Freedom Plaza. What’s worse is that these folks, plus a few more who shoaled me at 15th, refused to yield to a pedestrian crossing the cycletrack with the light. When I stopped so she could cross (which she did while waving her hands above her head in exasperation yelling that we all had red lights) I heard skidding behind me, swearing, and two more people whipped around me and almost hit her again.

[ATTACH=CONFIG]8498[/ATTACH]

[Dickie]

I got shoaled this morning on Lynn by a total “dude” on a cabbie who tried to to do a track stand and failed…. actually made my day. I squeezed him out of the bike lane as I passed heading towards the intersection of doom… good luck Mr. Fruit of the Loom showing, track stand failing, Cabbie riding Dude.

[Crickey7]

@Dickie 115226 wrote:

. . good luck Mr. Fruit of the Loom showing . . .

Indeed, that is the worst part of being shoaled. Makes me appreciate lycra’s stretchiness, smoothness and opacity.

[mstone]

@Crickey7 115234 wrote:

Indeed, that is the worst part of being shoaled. Makes me appreciate lycra’s stretchiness, smoothness and opacity.

opacity, until they get worn out and go all lululemon

[mstone]

@83(b) 115222 wrote:

I have once again found the outer limits of my patience. Happily it seems to be greater than last year; unhappily DC’s bike community doesn’t seem to be getting any less dickish as it grows in size.

I lost count at 40 today for times shoaled/passed with no warning, which I think is a new record. Including this entire batch of 8 by Freedom Plaza. What’s worse is that these folks, plus a few more who shoaled me at 15th, refused to yield to a pedestrian crossing the cycletrack with the light. When I stopped so she could cross (which she did while waving her hands above her head in exasperation yelling that we all had red lights) I heard skidding behind me, swearing, and two more people whipped around me and almost hit her again.

[ATTACH=CONFIG]8498[/ATTACH]

1) I totally have no problem with targeted enforcement ticketing cyclists infringing on pedestrian right of way like that.

2) Have you considered that you might need a V8?

[Author]

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