Dirt (The Stig) Legends

[Dickie]

I thought we should jump off the negative thread and start a new thread listing all the awesome urban legends that surround the mystic Dirt (Think “The Stig” for those TG fans)… I’ll start:

1) He’s 6’20” and made mostly out of radiation

Topic

[culimerc]

Dirt does not ride into the wind, the wind embraces and caresses him gently.

[americancyclo]

@KelOnWheels 55829 wrote:

Never! Dirt only sweats Secret Drink Mix.

Dirt’s sweat is the secret in Secret Drink Mix

[americancyclo]

Some say he once lead a group of sherpas off Mt. Everest on a unicycle with a cuesheet made from his own saliva.

[KelOnWheels]

@culimerc 55835 wrote:

I thought it was skratch labs lemon lime

Raspberry. It’s pinker.

[KelOnWheels]

Dirt does not wear sunglasses to protect his eyes from the sun. Dirt wears sunglasses to protect the sun from his eyes.

[Mikey]

When riding over the two sisters on the Custis, Dirt gets air on the first and lands on the down hill of the second, Evel Kinevil Style never touching the ground in between.

[jrenaut]

Dirt has never posted in the “Missed Connections” thread because he has never missed.

[Dickie]

The only reason the word “sand” exists is because God had already named the grittiest thing he knew “Dirt”, and then dressed him all in pink for irony!

[Mikey]

Cats always land on their feet; toast always lands butter side down. If you butter the back of a cat it will levetate in the air effortlessly. This may explain Dirt’s affection for felines.

[lim]

Some say that it’s impossible for him to wear socks, and he can open a beer bottle with his testes. All we know is he’s called Dirt

[Steve]

Dirt’s personality is so magnetic that he can’t carry credit cards.

[FFX_Hinterlands]

He opened his mouth and ate an airplane near National Airport. I saw it in a photo.

[Mikey]

@FFX_Hinterlands 55867 wrote:

He opened his mouth and ate an airplane near National Airport. I saw it in a photo.

and afterword he picked his teeth with the washington monument

[PotomacCyclist]

Chuck Norris is so fast that he can run around the Earth and punch himself in the back of the head.

But Dirt rode around the Earth so fast that he once smashed into his rear wheel… with his front wheel. He did not wobble from the collision. Instead, the ground shook.

[baiskeli]

Dirt once passed Chuck Norris so fast and so close on the Mt. Vernon trail that he broke Chuck’s finger.

[Author]

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