!! C a l v i n b a l l !!

[rcannon100]

Calvinball, the only true Freezing Saddles game, where the rules are constantly made up and the points don’t matter.

I am Tim the Enchanter, keeper of the score, final arbiter of the rules.

Your quest is to seek thee the gameball, hidden secretly amongst the cycling trails inside the beltway (but not to be found in any federal park).

Seek the game ball. Maketh up a new ordinance for the game. Hide the sacred ball. Post your new ordinance along with guidance on how those who follow can seek the gameball. Thou shall find, hide and post within the same hours 24.

For finding the gameball, ye shall be awarded 5 points, less a point for each day that passeth before the gameball is once again uncovered.

Ye may find the gameball but once during each orbit of the sun.* Ye may possess the gameball but once every other turn.

If your new ordinance nets three likes, ye shall likewise be award points equaling five and your ordinance shall be implemented as law of the game, which all who play must loyally adhere.

This be not organized competition. This be Calvinball. New rules are obliged to follow the spirit of Saint Calvin and Saint Hobbes. New ordinances shall not thee be bills of attainder but must generally apply to all fools of venture into our midst. New ordinances cannot benefit the ordinance’s scribe uniquely. New ordinances should make the court jester smile upon thee, and shall not place any in existential peril.

If a new ordinance shall contravene an old ordinance, the ordinance with highest net likes shall be declared the law.

Those who play shall seek their reward as follows:
• Rosalyn Award :: The player with the ordinance that has acquired the most net likes at the time of the next find
• Miss Wormwood Award :: The player with the most implemented ordinances
• Spaceman Spiff Award :: Best Calvinball
• Calvin Award :: Tim’s Award of Mystery (oooooooooohhh)
• Hobbes Award :: The Hobbes Prize is to be awarded to the person whom played but scored the least amount of points.
• Susie Award :: Most swag points
• Lost Dog Rescue Award :: Best picture of your dog

** Consider Thee Calvinball a Hot-potatoe game – not a hide-and-seek game. This be not geocaching. More, we wish the Calvinball attain perpetual motion, constantly moving, from pilgrim to pilgrim. (Translation: dont make your hides hard or your rules constraining. The more silliness the better)
** NOTE This is not a winner take all game. “The points dont matter“

[IMG]https://foreignpolicymag.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/87978-calvinball.jpg?w=306&h=313[/IMG]

* The Sun orbits around the earth. Only heretics would suggest otherwise. We burn heretics. Well, only if they weigh the same as a duck.

Topic

[rcannon100]

@Steve O 170842 wrote:

All praise to Tim the Enchanter. No disrespect, but one wonders about thy math.
10 points + 5 points + 2 points = 17 points

DARE THEE QUESTION TIM?!?!?? My spreadsheets are mystical. They have been concocted with 12 souls of unemployed english majors. I use the finest eye of newt imported from newark!!!

(oops. Couple of scoring errors. I see it. Will fix the algorithims. This is why nothing should be left to AI).

As for ordinances, well… we all know the prob of regs that lack enforcement clauses. Good ordinance are if / then statements.

REVISED SCORES
CBGanimal was cheated out of 5 points by the Russians. Her revised score is 22

SteveO was also cheated out of 5 points. But SteveO dared to question Tim’s math. Therefore SteveO loses 13 points. His revised score is reduced to 17.

Let all who follow this path tremble and know that there is a really really really bad price to pay for questioning Tim the Enchanter.

[Vicegrip]

Snowy cold bike ride
Icy hualin’, Watch for Follin’
Calvin bell rings trees.

[ATTACH=CONFIG]16029[/ATTACH]

New ordnance as required.
We shall be allowed to play thy game outside said beltway.

[Vicegrip]

Town signs hold the key
To success cold and wintery
This prize might be quite the hual.

[ATTACH=CONFIG]16033[/ATTACH]

[streetsmarts]

I really needed a laugh today; thanks rcannon!

and I have not played calvinball yet. So (hopefully) thou shalt not deduct points from thy humble …bikey friend (i.e. moi)

[reji]

Calvinball (key) has been acquired and a new Calvinball put in play.

Across from Crossfit
Look under the orange cone
Close to Caboose beer

[ATTACH=CONFIG]16040[/ATTACH]

New ordinance is that new Calvinballs must be put into play at least 1 mile from the previous one.

[Vicegrip]

There are two clues! The Calvinball is NOT the key. The Calvinball is released by the key to prevent interlopers (and add some complexity). The still in play Calvinball is at Follin lane intersection as shown in first image. Do you still have the key? If not let me know and I will reset the calvinball.

[reji]

@Vicegrip 170913 wrote:

The Calvinball is NOT the key. There are two clues! The Calvinball is released by the key. Calvinball is at Follin lane intersection as shown in first place. Do you still have the key?

Damn! I have the key and I know EXACTLY what it unlocks.

Please tell me I don’t have to carry that thing back, ’cause if you do, I’m going to throw away the key and create a new weight restrictive ordinance!

[rcannon100]

[Vicegrip]

@reji 170920 wrote:

Damn! I have the key and I know EXACTLY what it unlocks.

Please tell me I don’t have to carry that thing back, ’cause if you do, I’m going to throw away the key and create a new weight restrictive ordinance!

If the “Thing” had the Calvinball sticker with the QR on it then you were right there. If you don’t want it I will understand. Please put the key with the Calvinball, let us know and it will pass on to someone else. I don’t have another key.

As this Calvinball is still in play, and as such is still the One and True Calvinball (of the moment) I don’t think you have been anointed the finders power to create rules just yet. That is still My right. You will have to properly* retreve the One and True Calvin Ball first! Muhhhaahahha!

Trump voice on > My Calvinball is bigger! The other ball is Fake News! tRump voice off.

*Picture of said Prize on kitchen counter seems to be the SOP.

[Vicegrip]

@rcannon100 170924 wrote:

Hey, save me some!

[reji]

Calvinball level 2 unlocked. Pic coming after I lug this b@$!# back

[reji]

I had originally found the 2-ton Calvinball, but didn’t fully unwrap it from the plastic bag so I hadn’t seen the Calvinball sticker. I mean, what fool would create a Calvinball *that* heavy?!?!?!?!? But I went back out and brought it all back, including the plastic bag.

[ATTACH=CONFIG]16045[/ATTACH]

Now that I have the Calvinball, I’m calling my premature entry now valid.

[Sunyata]

@reji 170935 wrote:

I mean, what fool would create a Calvinball *that* heavy?!?!?!?!?

[ATTACH=CONFIG]16045[/ATTACH]

Have you met Vicegrip? :p

[josh]

Calvinball has been found. Will update once re-hidden.

[rcannon100]

SCORING

Vicegrip
Vicegrip’s new ordinance received three likes. Hey ConsularRider and Andy – this means yousse guys can now play the game. 5 points.
Vicegrip being a total sneak did not post a picture of the new Calvinball – so dilly dilly for that.
Vicegrip captured all five points for the find. – 5 points.
However – Vicegrip placed the Calvinball outside of the beltway before his new ordinance was codified. Vicegrip must learn to OBEY Tim the Enchanter. Therefore Vicegrip gets bupkus. Dilly Dilly. Nada. NOTHING. DO YOU HEAR ME!

Hey…. did you know that Vicegrip once took this really cool Raleigh bike frame – and cut it down and welded it into a walking cane for a member of the forum who crashed and busted his butt? I mean this thing was SOOOOO COOOL! For this – Vicegrip is awarded 20 points.

Reji
Reji’s new ordinance got three likes and is now the law of the land. 5 points. Once again Reji did not tell Tim what to do about (non)compliance, sooooooooo……
Reji also decided not to divulge the appearance of her new Calvinball – I but assume it was not the same Calvinball as Vicegrip’s. Maybe it was. Who knows. Dilly Dilly.
Reji gets all the find points. 5 points.
According to Josh’s photo, the swag Reji hid with her Calvinball was a flight of beer from Caboose. Most excellent. 5 extra points.
Reji is awarded 15 points.

I am Tim. I am capricious.

I bet none of you know what ‘Tim’ this is.

[Author]

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