!! C a l v i n b a l l !!
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Calvinball, the only true Freezing Saddles game, where the rules are constantly made up and the points don’t matter.
I am Tim the Enchanter, keeper of the score, final arbiter of the rules.
Your quest is to seek thee the gameball, hidden secretly amongst the cycling trails inside the beltway (but not to be found in any federal park).
Seek the game ball. Maketh up a new ordinance for the game. Hide the sacred ball. Post your new ordinance along with guidance on how those who follow can seek the gameball. Thou shall find, hide and post within the same hours 24.
For finding the gameball, ye shall be awarded 5 points, less a point for each day that passeth before the gameball is once again uncovered.
Ye may find the gameball but once during each orbit of the sun.* Ye may possess the gameball but once every other turn.
If your new ordinance nets three likes, ye shall likewise be award points equaling five and your ordinance shall be implemented as law of the game, which all who play must loyally adhere.
This be not organized competition. This be Calvinball. New rules are obliged to follow the spirit of Saint Calvin and Saint Hobbes. New ordinances shall not thee be bills of attainder but must generally apply to all fools of venture into our midst. New ordinances cannot benefit the ordinance’s scribe uniquely. New ordinances should make the court jester smile upon thee, and shall not place any in existential peril.
If a new ordinance shall contravene an old ordinance, the ordinance with highest net likes shall be declared the law.
Those who play shall seek their reward as follows:
• Rosalyn Award :: The player with the ordinance that has acquired the most net likes at the time of the next find
• Miss Wormwood Award :: The player with the most implemented ordinances
• Spaceman Spiff Award :: Best Calvinball
• Calvin Award :: Tim’s Award of Mystery (oooooooooohhh)
• Hobbes Award :: The Hobbes Prize is to be awarded to the person whom played but scored the least amount of points.
• Susie Award :: Most swag points
• Lost Dog Rescue Award :: Best picture of your dog** Consider Thee Calvinball a Hot-potatoe game – not a hide-and-seek game. This be not geocaching. More, we wish the Calvinball attain perpetual motion, constantly moving, from pilgrim to pilgrim. (Translation: dont make your hides hard or your rules constraining. The more silliness the better)
** NOTE This is not a winner take all game. “The points dont matter“[IMG]https://foreignpolicymag.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/87978-calvinball.jpg?w=306&h=313[/IMG]
* The Sun orbits around the earth. Only heretics would suggest otherwise. We burn heretics. Well, only if they weigh the same as a duck.
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To the north there lies a cave– the cave of Caerbannog– wherein, carved in mystic runes upon the very living rock, the last words of Olfin Bedwere of Rheged make plain the last resting place of the Calvinballs.
Here, in this cave, scrawled in ancient gaelic, be the last known ordinance of one they call…. Reji. It sayeth that there shall be now and hence forth….. two Calvinballs. In medieval times it was beyond the powers of pilgrims to understand geometric growth: the rule of Reji was not that Calvinballs shall double upon each discovery. Merely in the simplest of math that there be now four…..
(er, that’s “two” my lord)
er, that there be now two Calvinballs……
Darn missed the find!
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