Apologies to my Teammates

[rcannon100]

There is a bit less than one week till we find out who our beloved team members are. And yet, already we have seen a few honorable souls jump the gun and declare apologies for their failings.

I believe this deserves a thread of its own. Sort of like Catholic confession, or an AA meeting. You dont know who is on your team ~ but you know one thing ~ you have already let them down miserably.

This thread is dedicated to your apologies.

Allow me to get things along.

Forgive me teammates, for I have sinned. It has been a couple of hours since my last sleaze ride. Grant me the serenity To accept the teammates I cannot change, Courage to comply with Rule #9, and wisdom to know the difference between a balakava and baklava. Quando omni flunkus moritati. I’m a cyclist, but I can change, if I have to, I guess.

First, I want to apologize for my new bike light. That’s not really a problem. I got it in my stocking. Santa Claus must have gotten my Instant Message. It’s about 3000 lumens and any Ninja is gonna get lazer beamed out of the way.

Second, I want to apologize for March 2nd. On March 2nd it will occur to me what a massively moronic endeavor this is – I will leave my bike at home, while riding the subway, which happens to be running on time and isnt packed like a sardine can – while listening to Wait Wait Dont Tell Me podcasts.

Finally, I want to apologize for Maryland. I wasnt born there but I grew up there. I was given my first car at age 15, six months before I could drive. It was a V8 Chevy Nova. Engine was so powerful it could pull small buildings. It drank gas so fast it was individually responsible for the gas shortage of the 1970s. In one of those chaos theories of how history is created, it was my massively horrific driving as a teenager down River Road that set the seed for what is today Maryland’s miserable driving culture. For this, I apologize.

Now, please, its your turn. Please tell us how you will fail your yet-unknown-to-you team in the coming months.

Topic

[KelOnWheels]

I apologize for having an uncanny ability to get sick right at the beginning of #BAFS for two years running now

[Powerful Pete]

I apologise for not commuting in to work today. Not feeling very well, and on top of it all have a nagging achilles’ tendon pain that is very bothersome. 😡

Will endeavor to sleaze ride thanks to CaBi…

[Greenbelt]

I’m getting older and bones brittler; not riding far on days with black ice on the streets and glaciated footprints on the trails.

[creadinger]

@Greenbelt 104107 wrote:

I’m getting older and bones brittler; not riding far on days with black ice on the streets and glaciated footprints on the trails.

“far”? How about at all? Sorry to my teammates, but I’m not risking a broken collarbone, elbow, wrist or whatever by riding on ice to get 11 points in BAFS.

[Greenbelt]

@creadinger 104122 wrote:

“far”? How about at all? Sorry to my teammates, but I’m not risking a broken collarbone, elbow, wrist or whatever by riding on ice to get 11 points in BAFS.

I had a blast on the fresh snow yesterday, but 2nd and 3rd day ice is less fun. And since the main reason for riding is fun, then… I will usually get in at least one purposeful ride per day though, despite the weather, if only to the store or Metro. Not going to try to bust it all the way downtown on marginal days this winter just to spite Metro like I did for a couple years. I’ve forgiven them. The statute of limitations on their transgressions is over.

[ShawnoftheDread]

@Greenbelt 104127 wrote:

The statute of limitations on their transgressions is over.

They’ll reset it soon enough.

[PeteD]

I apologize for not having a bike that can handle tires >28mm (and the accompanying ice and snow). I apologize for being at S-1

[Powerful Pete]

I apologise for my first sleaze ride. Slightly over 5km. I feel dirty.

But it was oh so good.:cool:

[ShawnoftheDread]

That’s a legit distance, not sleaze at all.

[cyclingfool]

1 mile < sleaze < 2 miles
5 km > 2 miles
Ergo, by the transitive property, we can say that 5 km is not sleaze.

[Powerful Pete]

Very well, I stand corrected…

[Terpfan]

I apologize that I will likely record no points the next three days as I’m traveling to the Big Easy for work, where evidently it’s barely any warmer than here. I think I will be only person who goes to the Gulf Coast and still confronts windchills below freezing. Bah. At least they have good food.

[Steve O]

@Terpfan 104189 wrote:

I apologize that I will likely record no points the next three days as I’m traveling to the Big Easy for work.

I don’t think apologies are necessary. It’s only a small minority of riders who actually ride every single day. I already missed one on purpose so I don’t go crazy trying for perfect attendance (and I don’t apologize, so plblblblbbblbl!)

Last year’s middle 50% (ignoring the top and bottom quartiles) rode between 37 and 72 days of the 78 total days. So missing 3 is no big deal.

[Rod Smith]

Go to a bike shop in New Orleans and test ride a bike you’re interested in purchasing.

[Author]

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