!! C a l v i n b a l l !!
- This topic has 625 replies, 46 voices, and was last updated 7 years, 3 months ago by
.
-
Topic
-
Calvinball, the only true Freezing Saddles game, where the rules are constantly made up and the points don’t matter.
I am Tim the Enchanter, keeper of the score, final arbiter of the rules.
Your quest is to seek thee the gameball, hidden secretly amongst the cycling trails inside the beltway (but not to be found in any federal park).
Seek the game ball. Maketh up a new ordinance for the game. Hide the sacred ball. Post your new ordinance along with guidance on how those who follow can seek the gameball. Thou shall find, hide and post within the same hours 24.
For finding the gameball, ye shall be awarded 5 points, less a point for each day that passeth before the gameball is once again uncovered.
Ye may find the gameball but once during each orbit of the sun.* Ye may possess the gameball but once every other turn.
If your new ordinance nets three likes, ye shall likewise be award points equaling five and your ordinance shall be implemented as law of the game, which all who play must loyally adhere.
This be not organized competition. This be Calvinball. New rules are obliged to follow the spirit of Saint Calvin and Saint Hobbes. New ordinances shall not thee be bills of attainder but must generally apply to all fools of venture into our midst. New ordinances cannot benefit the ordinance’s scribe uniquely. New ordinances should make the court jester smile upon thee, and shall not place any in existential peril.
If a new ordinance shall contravene an old ordinance, the ordinance with highest net likes shall be declared the law.
Those who play shall seek their reward as follows:
• Rosalyn Award :: The player with the ordinance that has acquired the most net likes at the time of the next find
• Miss Wormwood Award :: The player with the most implemented ordinances
• Spaceman Spiff Award :: Best Calvinball
• Calvin Award :: Tim’s Award of Mystery (oooooooooohhh)
• Hobbes Award :: The Hobbes Prize is to be awarded to the person whom played but scored the least amount of points.
• Susie Award :: Most swag points
• Lost Dog Rescue Award :: Best picture of your dog** Consider Thee Calvinball a Hot-potatoe game – not a hide-and-seek game. This be not geocaching. More, we wish the Calvinball attain perpetual motion, constantly moving, from pilgrim to pilgrim. (Translation: dont make your hides hard or your rules constraining. The more silliness the better)
** NOTE This is not a winner take all game. “The points dont matter“[IMG]https://foreignpolicymag.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/87978-calvinball.jpg?w=306&h=313[/IMG]
* The Sun orbits around the earth. Only heretics would suggest otherwise. We burn heretics. Well, only if they weigh the same as a duck.
-
Hints
* Hints must be given in the form of a hiaku (with additional elements, i.e. photos, allowed).
* In lieu of haiku, one may composeth a limerick. Shalt a proper limerick be promulgated, player shalt be awarded 7 points.Field of Play
* NPS is out of bounds
* We shall be allowed to play thy game outside said beltway
* new Calvinballs must be put into play at least 1 mile from the previous one.
* Taking the Calvinball across state lines is worth 10 points. Going between MoCo — PG, Arlington — Alexandria, or from one quadrant of DC to another is worth 3 points.Calvinballs
* If you replace the gameball with a new Calvinball – if your new gameball nets 4 likes – you get 10 points. A new gameball becomes the gameball immediately upon placement. Create a new post showing the new gameball so that it can potentially net four likes.
* If you post a picture of the calvinball with a doggo or pupper you get 10 bonus points because they’re good dogs
** If you post a picture of an exceptionally clean puppy (your dog in bath with calvinball in shot), Tim may award a bonus of your pupper-related points (or your total points if so moved Tim shalt be) by cubing (x3) same.
** Transfiguration: All cats are also dogs.
* If thou retrieveth this Nivlacball and are unable to solve it ere a reasonable period of time (2-3 hours), then thou may not replaceth it, but must passeth it along to the next player who is then also bound by this ordinance. This ordinance shall also apply at any time this or any other puzzle box is introduced or re-introduced into Calvinball. Failure to abideth by this ordinance shall result in one week of play during which thou may earn no points (thou may play, but shan’t get points).
* 10 points for locating the Calvinball at night, cuz that’s when the freaks come outSwag
* If ye include cool swag with a Calvinball, ye shall receive 5 points
* If your swag is Tim’s mortal enemy, a chocolate bunny, you get 5 additional points
* If swag is consumed on premise, 10 points shall be awarded.
** If Calvinball ist found in or neare an establishment of foode or drinke, one may consume said proprietor’s goods (photo documented) and be awarded thy same pointes as consumeth of swag. No duple dipping, however. Awardeth of 10 points shall be the maximum for swag/locality consumption.
* If ye share your swagge with a straynger, ye shall be awarded 20 points.Spells
* The Spell of Warlock Judd: Upon the capture of any Calvinball, you may cast the Spell of the Warlock Judd once. While the Calvinball be in your possession, ye may picketh any other Freezer and reduce that Freezer’s Calvinball score by 3 points for every cycle around the Judd’s Hamster Wheel of Misery you bike (as shown in Strava, one ride on one day).
** Lycra Amendment: if you do hamster laps with panniers and a commuter bike…while getting funny looks from speedy Lycra racers you should get triple points! Visual evidence must be rendered.
* The Prior Incantato Spell: Scraped from the floor of Moaning Myrtle’s bathroom, Prior Incanto is a reverse spell to be used on the Malevolent who whine about the score. Freezers may use this spell against the Malevolent who whine that the Freezer has been unfairly or improperly awarded points. If the spell is cast, the points which the malevolent whined about shall be deducted from the Malevolent‘s score and awarded to the casting Freezer’s score. Likewise if the Malevolent whines that the Malevolent was unfairly deprived of points, any Freezer may cast the spell and those points shall likewise be deducted from the Malevolent and awarded to the casting Freezer.
* This is a new spell, Wingardium Leviosa. The way it works is that each time you’re hit with the curse of Judd, you can invoke it on one ride (to be started and finished within two days of the cursing), and every 200 feet one climbs gains one bonus point, and this is capped at 2 times the damage you’re hit with. E.g., CBGanimal will be taking a 15 point hit from my curse, and if she casts Wingardium Leviosa and does a ride with 1183 feet of elevation gain in the next two days, she will receive 5 points. The bonus would max out if she climbed 6000 feet in one ride (15 * 2 * 200), and would result in the damage being nullified (plus a bonus equal to the original damage).
* The Corleone Spell: If a Calvinball is found by a novice (someone who has not found a Calvinball before), the hider may cast the Corleono Spell and get a piece of the action, earning 20% of the Novice’s total initial score (Novice keeps full score; hider gets a 20% commission).
* The curse of Mr. Creosote: If someone finds or is in possession of more than one ball in the same day or at the same time, all points gained from all finds associated are applied negatively.Important Stuff
* Everyone is to bring Tim the Enchanter cookiesScoreboard
* new players who hath ne’er captured a calvinball are hereby awarded 15 bonus points upon thy first capture.
* Tim may arbitrarily and capriciously award up to three enchanted points
* Because Calvinball is in part medieval, the score shall – if its possible – be kept on the linked spread sheetSCORECARD (no promise this is complete)
10 Points for Find minus 2 points for every day that passes until the next find
15 Points First Find
10 points for locating the Calvinball at night
5 Points New Ordinance that gets 3 likes
10 Points New Calvinball that gets 4 likes
7 Points Limerick
10 Points Pic of Beast (3x pic your dog getting bath with calvinball)
5 Points Swag
5 More Points if Swag is Chocolate Bunnies
20 Points share swagge with a straynger
10 Points Consume Swag on Site
10/3 Points Cross Frontier of Realm/Province
3 Enchanted Points for those who are worthyPilgrim :: Total Score
Just remember, the points dont matterCheater 5 :: 4503 Points
Cheater 3 :: 2113 Points
Cheater 4 :: 1353 Points
Cheater 1 :: G Points
Josh :: 283 points
SteveO :: 244 points
CBGanimal :: 207 points
Mstansill :: 133 Points
Streetsmarts :: 128 points
Vicegrip :: 124 points
Huberww :: 106 points
SCHVIN :: 102 Points
Reji :: 114 points
Judd :: 74 points
Stryke :: 73 Points
PeteD :: 64 Points
SClaeys :: 64 Points
BENTBIKE :: 115 points
EMM :: 61
Sunyata :: 61 points
KarenW :: 52
NemaVeze :: 43 Points
Birru :: 43
Jon Levine :: 39
SarahBee :: 38 Points
FXBOOKS :: 23 points
TDean :: 18 points
rcannon100 :: 15 points
megoc42 :: 10 points
Chuxtr :: 30 points
PeteD :: – 107
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.